OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Dicks are not precious.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
