I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
