he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
