Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
She even gives head with a lisp.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize