My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
