You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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