You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
