I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
