i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. Itβs a good day everywhere
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize