Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
