Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
