Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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