Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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