I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
