You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
