You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
