Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
