I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
