I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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