He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
