I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
they're like a gay fantastic four
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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