I'm really into asian looking animals
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
But theres a keg here and me gusta
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
