I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
