okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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