it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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