I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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