why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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