it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
