Please, let me fuck your mom
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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