i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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