we have officially lost it.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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