Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
