bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
this boner is exhausting
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
