I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
