I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
where are you?
Hypothermia
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
