Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Randomize