and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
