This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
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