I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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