Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
