he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
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