so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
