Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
My vagina just clenched in fear
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
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