that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
