Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
