Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
