I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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