There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
