3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
