He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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