do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
